Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Ma barite khabo na...berochi...!


Pujo 2008.Another year rolled by.So many things changed,I repeat “sooo many”.Grew up quite a lot,’onek kichu sikhey gelam ei ekta bochor ey’.No more am I the same small stupid kid crying and fighting when friends do not call.

Not before Astami this year I realized pujo has come.One text in around 6 in the evening made me feel,”yes its pujo”.The message stated just a few words…”Maddox jachi,Maddox jachi...yess…! :D”.That very day in the morning I was whizzing past Golpark in a car,suddenly I looked out I could see a group standing,around 9-10 of them.A guy in a maroon Sherwani,specks,well trimmed beard at the chin,just with him was another guy,lean,thin,again with specs wearing jeans and a T-shirt,sharp chisel-cut look…The brightness in his face was noticeable.He was happy because of the girl in sky blue salwar-kameez standing just opposite to him and talking to a boy,a junior,her cousin.Oh something else was going on in another part of the group,a girl in saree….she looked so real cute,Chinese cut hair,lively eyes…… seemed so happy...Suddenly everything shook suddenly,oh no,it was the car drawing its brakes…the faces suddenly changed,everything disappeared.Every thing changed.I do not have a reason to say why that drop of tear rolled down.May be cause it was difficult to accept things changed so much.It was difficult to believe it was last year…She talks as if we were strangers. Yesternight when we were drunk,we tried to speak out…this thin guy was in his soliloquy…I caught him amidst it.He was saying,”Janis she used to be one person jar sathe kono rokom kono yaarki marar agey ekbar o chinta kortey hoyni,a raj…?she talks as if she is a stranger”.I knew what he meant,coz we met her on Nabami,at Maddox…indeed we had become strangers.

May be the last one year had been a year of losing,or else someone doesnot lose someone like Poulomi,I used to call her Polo…at tymes we jokingly said “Amar polo”.Not much days have passed when we talked any less than thrice.and now?haha…again the “strangers”.Everything sank just like the Durga-Protima on Doshomi…Its not about what went wrong?,who was wrong?,whose fault was it?…all it matters is my statement last night again in the sublime state…”I cannot afford not to talk to her”…sigh.That was again an answer to the question,”Whatz with u and polo?hmm?”Aah I guess I am being a bit too personal with myself.I believe I already made it sound too grim,though its not so.C’mon pujo…”Kolkatar Durga Pujo”!There are so many things to love about it,the dhak er awaj,Maddox er adda,hogging at fuchka,alur dum and churmur,the adda while standing in line in front of Peter Cat,though the sun and sweat were something I was hating,but again,”Y was Peter Cat called so?”helped us too pass our time.Thanx to KFC for quick food…!I love the 36-24-36…naah I guess it will look comical,36-28-36 is good enough,walking back home at 4:30 in the morning.I love the efficiency of Kolkata Police in Pujas…at least they work sometimes!The crowd in metro and pandals are fine and tolerable only during pujas…!And hey…friends?college buddies?Thanx to a real hell lot to them for making things so beautiful for me…!But still among soo many lovely things the gloom appears to be no less.I still miss the long calls at night,the evening chats,the cups of tea,the adda,the times at South City,Hiland Park,KFC…!Losing friends is bad I guess…the worse side is when u do without a fault of your own.U suffer because of someone’s presumptions,whims…haa haa…!But I guess u cannot help it at tyms.I guess getting drunk was necessary yesternight,I needed to speak up.I badly did.We were tired,its been too much for last quite sometime.Jitz I will be thankful to u all my life for that simple question…”Who is it u want the most,just 1,and the most…?”I answered just one word…which may be I won’t speak up in life…!!

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